YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
Most kids are talented non-listeners. Why? First of all they don’t want to do the ‘boring’ stuff you tell them to do. Video games or legos are waaay more fun. And secondly, they know you’ll end up doing whatever it is you asked of them. How do they know? Expereince has taught them well! You never fail, you ask three times, you scream, most likely you completely lose your cool. Then you feel GUILTY. After that, all bets are off. You’re pretty predictable as a parent.
How do we change this cycle? Just ask your kids ONCE to do something. Say, please pick up your shoes from the middle of the living room by dinnertime. Don’t be disappointed when they don’t ‘hear’ you. In fact, you’d be shocked if they did what you asked, right? Don’t give them a bunch of warnings.
If they don’t take care of the shoes in a reasonable amount of time…then you take care of it for them. You do this quietly after the kids have gone to bed. You take those shoes, put them in the cabinet above the dryer (noone would ever look there) and forget about them.
When your kid is looking for his favorite pair of sneakers all you have to say is this, “That’s too bad, you didn’t pick them up so I had to do it for you. You’re welcome to get them back for $2 (or a toy, or two chores, etc.).” Your kid will flip. It’s okay. Just stay calm and repeat that line over and over. Your kid will start to see that you mean business and THAT’s when they’ll start listening to what you have to say.
Want to learn more Love and Logic parenting tips and tools? Want to take the frustration and exhaustion out of parenting? Keep your eyes peeled for information coming soon! I’ll be holding a CRASH COURSE or two just in time for summer. And, I’m always available for private sessions. To learn more click here.